No Girls Allowed
by Bellaluna1
Summary: What if there was no KND? Only Boys Next Door and Girls Next Door? Numbuhs 3 and 5 are assigned to their most dangerous mission yet, infiltrating BND, as boys? 34, 15
1. Dress Up

No Girls Allowed

By: Bellaluna

Chapter One: Dress Up

**Disclaimer: I do not own KND, the show and its characters are property of Mr. Warburton and CN. This fanfic is mine though, so please do not copy or steal it!**

**Author's Notes: Hey all, recently I have been getting quite obsessed with KND, as well as some other cartoons, but the other night while watching operation: F.U.T.U.R.E, I got an idea, that is sort of based off the episode. What if it had always been Girls Next Door and Boys Next Door, and Kids Next Door had never existed? Oh, and note that I have made the main KND operatives; around 15 so there can be romance. I know that bends the rules a bit…but bear with me please. Well here we go!**

Chapter One: Dress Uo

"Operatives Numbuh Three and Five please report to the debriefing room immediately," a distinctly Irish accented voice called over the loudspeaker system. "I repeat, operatives Numbuh Three and Five."

"Numbuh Five! Numbuh Five!" Numbuh Three, Kuki Sanban shook her partner, and friend Numbuh Five, Abby Lincoln. Numbuh Five was currently lying on her bed, a magazine draped over her face, feigning sleep. "Come on Numbuh Five! They want us in the debriefing room!" The younger girl pleaded, tugging on Numbuh Five's sleeve.

"Oh awlright," Abby sighed wearily and took the magazine off her face, moving to a sitting position. "Lez go," she said, adjusting her red cap on her head.

"Hooray!" Numbuh Three shouted with joy and jumped up and down. She hurried to the door, skipping as usual and opened it, letting Numbuh Five out first, and then following after her. "I wonder what are mission is this time!" she said anxiously. "I can't wait."

"Oh yeah, I'm sure it'll be a hoot," Abby rolled her eyes. "But I s'ppose nothing can be as bad as out last mission. Dressing up like vegetables in front of a grocery store. Heh, it doesn't get much worse then that."

"You'll be disguising yourselves as boys."

"WHAT?" Numbuh Five shouted angrily.

"You 'eard me Numbuh Five," Numbuh 86 said absently, searching through the mountain of paper work on her desk. "You an' Numbuh Three are to infiltrate Boys Next Door HQ disguised as boys. You can very well go trouncin' about as yourselves. You'd be killed on the spot."

"Yeah! Dress up!" Numbuh Three giggled over the aspect of a new costume, even if it was as a boy.

"But, Numbuh 86, waz the point of infiltratin' them. If we get caught, it'll just make the boys hate us girls even more, and we're trying to gain an alliance."

"Yes, well the point is not to get caught Numbuh Five," Numbuh 86 smirked slightly, still sifting through the papers. "We need to know more about the boys. We need to know if an alliance would be worth it, and if it is we need to know how to go about getting one. Understand?"

"Sure!" Numbuh Three thrust her arm up into the air in excitement. Numbuh Five however remained silent, starring straight at the ground.

"Numbuh Five?" 86 looked up at Abby, her eyebrows arched.

"Yeah yeah, Numbuh five gets it," she grunted and turned to exit the room. "When are we leavin'?"

"Tomorrow."

"Tomorrow," Nigel Uno, Numbuh One stated to his two partners, Numbuhs Two and Four.

"You've got to be kidding me!" Wallabee Beetles exclaimed angrily. "We don't need any new cruddy operatives on our team!"

"Well it doesn't matter what you think Numbuh Four, these are orders straight from the boss," Numbuh One retorted, tossing a folder with information on the two new operatives, on the table. Numbuh Four picked up the folder and scanned its contents.

"Numbuh Three, Koki Sanban and Numbuh Five, Al Lincoln," he muttered under his breath.

"Aw, c'mon Numbuh Four, it can't be that bad. We can use all the help we can get. I'm sure the boss wouldn't stick us with complete newbies," Numbuh Two laughed.

"I wouldn't be too sure about that," Wally said tossing the folder to Numbuh Two, who caught it.

Looking inside, his eyes widened. "They just joined BND?" He shouted in surprise.

"Oh yeah, this is gonna be great," Numbuh Four grunted and left for his bedroom.

"Yeah…this is gonna be great," Numbuh Five said sarcastically as she looked up at their new 'home' for the time being, a giant tree house.

"Aw, come on Numbuh Five it's not that bad!" Numbuh Three tried to cheer her friend up. "I think it looks cool. Maybe and bit dirty…but weeeeeell, they are boys," she squinted up at the tree house.

"Shush!" Numbuh Five said clapping a hand to Numbuh Three's mouth. "From here on in, we're boys too, no matter how much we don't like it. I know I don't." She grumbled, removing her hand from Kuki's mouth, and touching in to her head. "I can't believe they even made us cut our hair…"

"I know!" Numbuh Three whined. "And I had to leave all my Rainbow Monkeys behind!"

"I'm sure you'll survive…" Abby rolled her eyes. "Well, lez get going," she shrugged and went to ring the doorbell of the main house.

Soon they could hear footsteps approaching the door and the door itself swung open, revealing a boy, around their age, though quite bald, sporting shorts, a red turtleneck and sunglasses. "Ah, you must be the new operatives," he nodded at them, speaking in a British accent. "I'm Nigel Uno, Numbuh One."

"Numbuh Five, and this is Numbuh Three." Numbuh five said nonchalantly, pointing her thumb at Kuki.

"Hiiiii!" Numbuh Three waved excitedly, sounding as far from a boy as she could get.

"Er…" Numbuh One looked at Numbuh Three oddly.

"Ah, sorry. Numbuh Three can get a bit excited at times…he probably didn't take his medication this morning…did you Numbuh Three?" Numbuh Five glare over at her partner.

"What medi…OH! Yeah, I guess I did!" she giggled.

"Riiiight…. well why don't you two come in?" Numbuh One said, stepping aside from the door. "The stairs over there lead to the tree house," he explained pointing to a staircase in side.

Abby and Kuki followed the stairs up to the main room of the tree house, where two other boys, a angry looking blonde one, and a content looking one who wore a pilots beanie and goggles. "This is Numbuhs Two and Four," Numbuh One said from behind them. "Numbuh Two, Numbuh Four, this is Numbuh Three and Numbuh Five."

"Hello!" Numbuh Two waved with a welcoming tone.

"Hey," Numbuh Four shrugged, uncaring.

"Hey," Numbuh Five said, equally uncaring.

"Hello!" Numbuh Three grinned from ear to ear. She eyed the large room around and began skipping about looking everything over. "Ohhhh This is cool!" she said with wide eyes.

Wally watched the newcomer skip around the room and began to snicker. His snicker grew to a full out explosion of laughter. "Look at em'!" He gasped in between laughs. "He's prancing about like some…some gurl!"

Hoagie began to chuckle along with him. "You're right….the boss must be getting really desperate!" The two boys continued to laugh hysterically from the couch.

Meanwhile Kuki spun around, facing the couch and glared at the two boys, fire in her eyes. All at the same time tears were whelming up in those same eyes. "Y-you big meanies!" She cried, throwing her rather heavy suitcase directly at them with all her might, knocking the wind out of both of them in one blow. "Jerks!" She gritted her teeth, unable to hold back the tears anymore, and ran back down the stairs in hysterics.

Numbuh Five grunted, shoving her hands in her pants pockets. "Erm…I should go have a talk with him…he's been through er…a lot lately." She lied and made her way down the stairs as well.

"Ah, I'm glad we're all making an effort to welcome our new partners." Numbuh One said sarcastically, momentarily glaring at the two incapacitated boys on the couch and went to his room.


	2. Accommodations

No Girls Allowed

Bellaluna

Chapter Two: Accommodations

**Disclaimer: Same as the first chap.**

**Author's Notes: Whoo! Chapter Two here we come! I have more to say at the end...XD**

Chapter Two: Accommodations

Numbuh Five found Numbuh Three sitting at the curb, her face buried in the palms of her hands, still crying quite profusely. "Numbuh Three…" Numbuh Five started, not quite sure what to say next.

"I…I can't do it Numbuh Five! They're just too mean…" Kuki sniffled.

"Well, the truth is, that we don't have a choice Numbuh Three. We need that alliance, and so do they, whether they admit it or not. Separated we're weak against the adults…and if we don't do something soon we'll loose to them."

"I know, I know, but…how are we even supposed to survive this…living with those creeps?"

"Now, Now, Numbuh Five thinks that we're juz not use to the boys, and the boys aren't use to um…such girly guys, let alone girls…We just need to give em a chance," Numbuh Five suggested. "What do ya' say hm?"

Numbuh Three sniffled once more, and used her baggy green sleeve to wipe away her tears. "I…I guess so," she said glumly.

"Good, now, I hate t' admit it, but dat blond brat had a bit of a point. You need to act more boyish…not like your normal self."

"Okay…I'll do my best," Numbuh Three said, trying to use a deeper tone in her voice. "For the help…"

"Awlright," Numbuh Five said, helping Numbuh Three up. "Lez get back in there and try this again?"

"Uh huh," Kuki nodded and trotted back inside.

When they reached the main room once more, Numbuh Four was the only one left in the room. He was still sprawled out on the couch, dramatically gasping for air. He didn't seem to notice the two reenter so Numbuh Three walked over the couch, reluctantly of course and looked down at him. "Erm…I'm sorry for throwing this at you," she apologized weakly as she lifted the suitcase from the couch. "I'm just…a bit nervous."

"Yeah…well keep your stupid nervousness to yourself or I'll beat the crud out of you!" Numbuh Four spat angrily, sitting up.

"Well maybe if you hadn't been such a jerk, I wouldn't have thrown anything at you!" Kuki retorted. She planned on being nice to Numbuh Four, but if all he was going to do was be a jerk, well she wasn't going to take his attitude.

"Oh yeah?" Numbuh Four starred at Numbuh Three intensely, shock hiding in his eyes. He hadn't expected this new guy to fight back. "Well….well…aw, just shut up about it!" He fizzled out while looking for the proper comeback and marched off to his room.

Numbuh Five let out a nice, hearty laugh. "Ah, you showed him Numbuh Three!" she complimented the younger girl. "Good job. Now lets see if we can figure out where we're supposed to be staying. "Dat Numbuh One seemed like the leader of the group, so why don't we go find him an' ask?"

"Oki Doki!" Numbuh Three cheered as they made their way down a hallway to a room with a large red '1' painted on it's door.

Upon reaching the door Numbuh Five took the opportunity to knock on it. "Hey…Numbuh One? You in der?" she called.

The door opened and Numbuh One emerged. "Ah, welcome back," he sighed in relief. "I'm glad Numbuh Two and Numbuh Four didn't scare you two off. They're really not…all that bad," he did his best to assure them.

"Numbuh Five's sure," Abby said, trying her best to sound convinced. "Now, we were juz wonderin' where our rooms are at. We could use some rest y'know?"

"Ah yes," Numbuh One nodded and walked further down the hall. "Unfortunately we did not receive much warning on your arrival so we haven't had enough time to create a space for your rooms yet, so you'll have to share the Numbuh Two and Four. I hope you don't mind too much."

"Great…." both girls muttered to each other.

"Numbuh Three is to stay in Numbuh Four's room, and Numbuh Five, you'll be staying in Numbuh Two's room."

"But…" Numbuh Three began, but Numbuh Five quickly hushed her.

"Juz do it Numbuh Three," she whispered. "It's only for a little while."

"Oh fine," Numbuh Three pouted and followed Numbuh One to Numbuh Four's room. Numbuh One didn't bother knocking and opened the door, all three of them immediately spotting Numbuh Four laying on her stomach on her bed, flipping through a comic book of some sort. He looked up at them and began to grumble.

"What ah you doing er'?" he demanded, leaping off of his bed into a standing position.

"Numbuh Four, I told you already. Numbuh Three is to share your room until we prepare their own separate rooms. Remember?" Numbuh One explained exasperated. He was extremely tired and he just wanted to get all the formalities over with and rest for a bit.

Kuki decided to speak up. "I…promise not to throw anymore suitcases at you if you promise not to call me girly okay?" she said, thrusting her hand forward. "Is it a deal?"

"Whatever," Wally rolled his eyes and roughly shook Numbuh Three's hand.

"Good, good," Nigel nodded and began to stroll back out of the room. "This way Numbuh Five." He called. Abby gave one last look at Kuki who was already busy setting up house in a corner of the room. Feeling that Kuki wouldn't blow it for them she finally followed Numbuh One back into the hall, the door slamming shut behind them.

"Well where to boss?" Numbuh Five smirked at Numbuh One.

"This way," he said leading her to yet another room, a large number two painted in red on the door. This door he took the time to knock on. "Numbuh Two, is it safe to come in?" he called.

"Safe?" Numbuh Five arched her eyebrows in confusion.

"Yeah come on in Numbuh One!" Hoagie's voice came from inside. The door opened at Abby followed Numbuh One cautiously. She looked wide-eyed around the room. Everywhere there where machines, and experiments, some finished, some half finished, and some just begun.

"As you can see, Numbuh Two is the engineer of the group," Numbuh One explained. "So you'll need to be careful he isn't experimenting before you come in."

"Got it," Numbuh Five nodded.

"Hey Numbuh One, Numbuh Five!" Numbuh Two greeted them as he jumped off a platform that held a laser of sorts, and landed in front of them. "I cleaned out an area over on that side of the room for you Numbuh Five," he said pointing to a clean area of the room.

"Hey, thanks," Numbuh Five said curtly and walked over there, leaving the other two alone.

"You look beat Numbuh One. You should go sleep." Numbuh Two noted, putting and hand on Nigel's shoulder. "I mean, you never know when you-know-who may show up," he smirked.

"Greeeeat." Nigel sighed, sounding more tired then ever. "I'll just finish up what I'm working on and take a nap," he decided.

"Sounds good. I'm sure nothing to big will happen," Numbuh Two said and began to get back to work on the laser. "I'll be sure to get you if anything does."

"Right, Thanks Numbuh Two. Keep an eye on Numbuh Four will you? I don't want another episode of what happened earlier, and that includes you." He gave Numbuh Two a stern looked.

"Right, right. Don't worry about it." Numbuh Two grinned. "We'll be on out best behavior." Without saying anymore Numbuh One left the room and trudged towards his own.

**Author's Notes: Whoooo Chapter Two done. I hope this is an enjoyable fic, and I always welcome suggestions! So please if you have any, tell me in your review! Hrm…I wonder who 'you-know-who' is…mwahaha.**

**To answer some questions in the last set of reviews…**

**I made it pg-13, because there will be moments, where it will probably need to be such a rating. But…I could just be over reacting**

**1,2,and 4 have never met 3 and 5 before in this fanfic.**

**So there you have it! Please review!**


	3. HER

**No Girls Allowed**

**Bellaluna**

**Chapter Three: HER**

**Disclaimer: I still don't own KND, and I never will, so shush.**

**Author's Notes: Heeeeey! So it seems people are enjoying this so I'm very happy to continue. Well, enough with the small talk, let's get going shall we?**

**Chapter Three: HER**

Kuki looked nervously around the large room after unpacking what little stuff she had brought. Numbuh Four had resumed his spot on the bed, contently reading his comic and completely ignoring the fact that she was even there. She sat there in silence for a little while, but soon her personality got the better of her and she jumped out of her sitting position and quietly crept over to Numbuh Four, being careful not to be seen. She leaned over his shoulder and peered at the comic. "Whatcha doing?" she finally said, happily, causing Wally to jump about a foot off his bed.

"W-what d'you think yer doing?" Wally cried, clutching his hand to his chest, gasping for air. "Ya nearly scared me t'death!" he said angrily.

"Oh…I'm sorry," Numbuh Three said and starred down at the ground. "I…just wanted to see what you were reading…"

Wally grunted and sat back on his bed, directing his attention back to the comic. "It's 'Mutant Slugs From Mars'," he mumbled. "Nothin' _you'd_ be interested in ahm sure."

In all honesty Kuki had never even heard of 'Mutant Slugs From Mars' but she shrugged, remaining silent and peered back over Numbuh Four's shoulder, reading the comic with him. She didn't really understand why some huge slugs were fight with the humans, but she giggled here and there when a funny part arose on the pages.

Wally of course was finding this all quite annoying, but at least Numbuh Three wasn't being loud and not TOO obnoxious. 'Whateveh…' he thought and rolled his eyes.

"So what you working on?" Numbuh Five asked after unpacking. She had grown quite curious as Numbuh Two toiled away on the laser he was working when she had first entered the room. Numbuh Two didn't seem to register that he had been asked a question as he still continued to work, not answering. "Um…hello?" Numbuh Five said a bit grumpily.

"Oh!" Numbuh Two finally stopped working and looked up at Numbuh Five. "What was that?" he wondered.

"Ah I said…what ah you working on?" Abby repeated.

"Um, well you see…" Hoagie said, searching around the room for something. "Ah ha!" He shouted, and leapt forward, just past Numbuh Five. Abby gasped and followed is movement, only to see him sprawled out on his stomach, holding a hamster in his hands. He laughed nervously and sat up, still holding the hamster. "Eh hem, as I was saying…I'm working on a laser that will increase the size and strength of a hamster!" he said proudly, holding the hamster up, who grinned knowingly at Abby. "With super-powered hamsters our strength will be hugely increase," he explained, glad to have someone who seem interested in his work.

"Hm…Numbuh Five thinks dats an interesting idea." Abby grinned and reached out her hands for the hamster to walk on to, which it did. "'Ave you tested it yet?" she wondered.

"No, not yet. It's not safe to test yet, but it should be ready in a few weeks to test," Hoagie said with a boyish grin.

"Dats coo." Numbuh Five smirked, mentally noting this experiment in her mind. KND HQ would defiantly want to hear about it. (Yes, I meant to say KND. You'll see D)

Suddenly an alarm rang out. Flashing red lights followed the shrieking noise. "What da heck is goin' on?" Abby shouted, covering her ears.

"Erm…well that's the girl alarm," Hoagie replied. "It goes off whenever there's a girl in the area of the tree house!" he shouted over the alarm.

Abby immediately panicked. Had it picked up on her and Numbuh Three? But Numbuh 86 had seen to it that they wouldn't be detected as girls…somehow. 'Well if it not us…who is it?' she wondered.

"Ey! Numbuh Two!" Numbuh Four's voice shouted from outside of the room. "Is it oo' ah think it is!"

"Lemme check," Numbuh Two replied. "Come on in!" The door to the room opened and Wally burst in, in a panic with Numbuh Three behind him with an oblivious smile on her face. Numbuh Two turned to the wall and pressed a rather large red button. A television screen emerged from a hidden spot on the wall. Hoagie looked into it a grimaced. "Yeah…it's her," he sighed.

"Ugh…this is pathetic!" Numbuh Four shouted angrily. "We can't have that stupid gurl waltzin' in ere' all the time!"

"You're telling me?" Hoagie rolled his eyes. "Well…someone better go wake up Numbuh One."

"You mean the stupid alarm hasn't done dat already?" Numbuh Five shouted.

"Nope, Numbuh One's weird like that…he sleeps through the loud things, wakes up for the quiet things." Numbuh Two smirked. "So who wants the honor?"

"Oh I'll do it." Abby crossed her arms in front of her chest and rolled her eyes.

"Right, and we'll go 'great' er'." Numbuh Four gritted his teeth, looking like he was going attack the next thing to move.

Abby retreated from the room and headed down the hall once more to Numbuh One's room. She tried knocking and calling in, so when no one answered she opened the door herself and walked in. The room itself was pretty empty, but at the center of the room was a small bed, and on it was Numbuh One sleeping soundly. Abby smirked and made her way to the bed. Upon reaching it she leaned forward and shook Numbuh One's shoulders. "Ey, Numbuh One! Wake up," she called. "Ders some girl ere' and Numbuh Two said to git you."

Numbuh One's eyes shot open in an instant. He jerked up into a sitting position. "Girl? What?" He shouted and lept off his bed, facing Numbuh Five, his sunglasses still lying near his pillow.

"Ya, Numbuh Two and Four kept saying et was 'her'," Numbuh Five replied using finger quotes when she said 'her'.

Numbuh One let out a nervous laugh. "Ooh…" he said and quickly grabbed his glasses. "Well then, follow me…" He mumbled and took Abby's hand and dragged her out of the room and into the main room of the tree house.

When they got there Numbuh Two was preparing to open the door for 'her'. His hand shakily reached for the button to open the door until he finally pressed it, the door opening immediately. There at the doorway stood…

"How many times have I told you not to use the front door…Lizze?" Numbuh One shouted angrily.

"Aw…I'm sorry Nigie!"

"NIGIE?" Both Numbuh Three and Five screeched.

**Author's Notes: Mwahahahaha, wow, so who DIDN'T see that coming? haha. Well anyways, I hope you all enjoyed the chapter! Please review!**


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